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Why we love our phones so much
might be related to our basic yearnings as human beings, explains a
scholar, who is also a pastor.
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By Jaco Hamman
Salon
Apple recently announced the launch of its iPhone 8 and iPhone X, which
come with sleek, new features. Apple also hopes to start a new community
around the iPhones. Ahead of the launch, Angela Ahrendts, head of
retail at Apple, said their stores will be called “Town Squares,” and
would double as public spaces, complete with outdoor plazas, indoor
forums and boardrooms.
The much-anticipated product launch was followed by millions who watched
the event via livestream and on internet forums, blogs and in the news
media.
too, was among them.
So, what draws people to these phones? Surely, it is not just the
groundbreaking design or the connection with a community. As a minister,
psychotherapist and scholar studying our relationship with hand-held
devices, I believe there is much more going on.
In fact, I’d argue, as I do in my book “Growing Down: Theology and Human
Nature in the Virtual Age,” the phones tap into our basic yearnings as
humans.
Here are my three reasons why we love our phones.
1.
Part of an extended self
Our sense of self is shaped while we are still in the womb. The
development of the self, however, accelerates after birth. A newborn,
first and foremost, attaches herself to the primary caregiver and later
to things – acquiring what has been called an “extended self.”
The leading 20th-century American psychologist William James was among
the first to argue for an extended self. In his “Principles of
Psychology,” James defined the self as “the sum total of all that a man
can call his, not only his body and his psychic powers, but his clothes
and his house, his wife and children.” Losing any of this extended self,
which could include money or another prized object, as he explained,
could lead to a sense of great loss. In early childhood, for example,
babies and toddlers cry if they suddenly lose their pacifier or favorite
soft toy, objects that become part of their extended selves.2.
Recalling caring relationships
Not just extended selves, smartphones in particular, with their games, apps and notifications, have become an essential aspect of our sense of self.
Holding our phone has the same effect as when a parent looks lovingly at her child or when two lovers gaze into each other’s eyes. In the words of Apple executive Philip Schiller: The iPhone X “learns who you are.”
Theological reflection also supports what we have learned about dopamine and oxytocin. The Judeo-Christian tradition, for example, identifies God as an intimate God who seeks face time and creates caring environments. In Bible, Numbers 6:24-26, we read:
Fulfills need to produce and reproduce
Anthropologist Michael Taussig reminds us that it is in our “second nature to copy, imitate, make models, [and] explore difference” as we try to become a better or different self.
It should not come as a surprise then that smartphones currently account for 46 percent of all internet use. This is expected to grow to 75 percent by 2021. We are destined, it seems, to live with our phones in hand.
Living with technology
Having said this, sometimes, however, I would argue, we need to show up in person and make a difference.We can be disappointed if we limit our spaces and relationships to small screens or to “town squares.” We need intimate relationships where we give and receive touch, where we gaze into someone’s eyes. We also need spaces – some will be online – where deep connections can be made, where we can rest, play and discover.
So, as some of us head over to the Town Square to purchase the latest iPhone or venture online, it would be best to remember the dictum of historian of technology Melvin Kranzberg: “Technology is neither good nor bad; nor is it neutral.”
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